my first private cheffing job came from a dm

three lessons I've learned since then + my client's favorite appetizer

my first private cheffing job came from an instagram dm weeks after finishing culinary school. how absolutely ridiculous, right?

scenes from the first two months of my very first cheffing gig

In August 2023 I had just wrapped up my externship at Blue Box Café, which also marked the culmination of culinary school. I had worked, part-time, for Daniel Boulud all through school, running his personal social media account… which meant chasing DB around all of his NYC restaurants and the different events/ functions he was attending, gathering content, and editing it together for social media. My tentative plan after school was to pivot and work with his corporate chef team, the team involved with special events, new restaurant openings, recipe testing, etc. It seemed like a damn perfect option for someone who went to culinary school not fully knowing what they wanted to do after school, but knowing they did not want to work in a restaurant.

By August 2023 I had also amassed a following of around 120,000 people (99% of which followed during culinary school). I was totally confused by what would become of both my content and my following post school.

Insert DM from Brian (now a friend!) of executive chefs at home.

I still feel a swell of nerves reading this lmao

I sent over my resume (mind you, it’s August 2023, and the culinary school end date listed on said resume was August 2023, so I was cautious of where this could possibly lead) and chatted with Brian on the phone. Then, one facetime and two cooking interviews later with the prospective clients, the job was mine. I quite literally could not believe it.

Lesson 1: Imposter Syndrome never dies (at least it hasn’t yet)

I could not wrap my head around the fact that these people, these wealthy, successful people, ACTUALLY wanted me to cook for them when I had no professional experience. I was sick with nerves every day of those first few weeks thinking “today is the day they find out I actually don’t know what I’m doing, I don’t know how to cook, and I definitely don’t know how to be a private chef.” Each day after I returned home from work I would breath a huge sigh of relief that I had made it another day.

I spent 6 months at that first gig, September 2023 to March 2024, and in that time cheffed 5 days a week, including monthly large scale dinner parties and a handful of epic (not at all dinner) parties too. I left the job feeling infinitely more confident as a chef. It felt so good to be on the other side of imposter syndrome. I had outgrown it.

I found my next client a month later, and was so confused when that same voice crept back in, saying “you don’t know what you’re doing, you’ve lost it! you don’t know how to cook anymore” for those first few weeks. The voice definitely wasn’t as loud as it was back in September, but she was definitely there.

When I committed to working for a different family out in the Hamptons for the summer, the same voice hitched a ride on that god forsaken jam packed long island railroad train, again saying, “you don’t have enough experience to do this, you’ve made it this far from luck, you don’t know how to cook well enough to be a private chef.”

You’d think a proven track record of successful past experiences would shut that voice up. Or maybe the following of now 450k people I had amassed on IG would help. But it somehow never did. In fact, it added a lot more pressure that I had to impress not only my clients, but all the other people tuning in for the ride.

That summer gig lasted through September and when I started cheffing again this past December…. whadda ya know… the voice was back saying the same old shit. That I’m not ready, not experienced enough, not good enough- that luck has gotten me this far and pretty soon I’ll be exposed as a total fraud.

Unfortunately I don’t have a resolution for you or myself lmao. The only thing that has changed is I’ve gotten used to that voice being around. At the very least, I can now find comfort in knowing she’s gonna creep back in at the beginning of every gig, say what she always says, and I can actively choose not to pay attention to her…with of course the secret hope that she continues to get quieter and quieter and quieter until I can’t hear anything at all.

Lesson 2: words can change flavor

I once was cooking for a 20 person dinner party and burned the shit out of a tray potatoes I had painstaking punched into nickel sized rounds and arranged into small blossoms. The second tray was cooked perfectly, but the blossom patterns completely fell apart. They were supposed to be a side to the main course. I could have scrapped the potatoes altogether, they really would not have been missed, but they were listed on the printed menus each guest had at their place setting on the table.

my mini pommes anna looking beautiful before entering the oven…

RIP

So just before the mains were served, I grabbed some tea cups, funnelled the non-burned potato rounds into them, and delivered them to the table. I presented them after all the mains and sides were served, and said “and finally…here are some oven-roasted potato coins intended to sprinkle over your wagyu to add crunch and salt to every bite. please enjoy.”

Everyone loved it. In fact, after dinner my client came up to me and said not only was that the best meal I’ve ever cooked for them, but how the hell did I come up with that potato coin idea?!? It was ‘genius’. I kid you not.

It was in this moment that I realized my words could directly impact how my client experienced their meal, irrespective of the food itself. Just think, they would not have been impressed if I had said “sorry I burned the potatoes and they completely fell apart because I’ve never made them like this before so now I don’t have enough to serve them as a side but thought maybe you could just use them to sprinkle over your wagyu” which is exactly what I was thinking!!!!. There’s nothing genius about what I described…we have the exact same potatoes in both circumstances… but the my words actually altered the experience of my client.

From that day forward, I really leaned into the descriptions of my food, especially for dinner parties when my clients liked to put on a show. Instead of serving the main and describing “and here is our wagyu, please enjoy.” I would say “alright for our main course we have this beautiful American Wagyu ribeye from Snake River Farms in Idaho, considered by most chefs as the pioneer of American Wagyu . The marbling is absolutely beautiful in this cut making it exceedingly juicy and tender. I hope you enjoy!”

Again, there is no difference in the hypothetical wagyu served. But I can pretty much guarantee that people would say the steak served with the latter description tasted better than the first. Words hold power- and learning to describe my food in ways that actually alter and improve the flavor feels like claiming free bonus points with zero extra effort.

Lesson 3: mental organization is paramount

The single most important factor in determining the success of a meal I’m creating for a client is my level of preparation. There’s the physical prep of making all of the sauces and dressings and perfectly chopped shallots and chives stored in labeled deli quart containers… but I’m talking about all the shit that happens before you ever start cooking. The fully fleshed-out menu, organized grocery list, and comprehensive prep list.

Especially during my first few months private cheffing, my night before organization was quite literally the one thing keeping me sane and giving me the next-morning confidence boost I needed to do my job. I would think “everything I need to do is accounted for and written out, I now just need to execute it”.

Each day I would create a new page with my daily menu and grocery/prep lists (for me, everything exists in Notion, the productivity/planning app that organizes my entire life.) After each meal, I would go back and write notes for myself on things that worked, things that didn’t, and what I would do next time.

my meal archive for my first clients. I can go back and see exactly what I made for them on any given day

one of the menus I made for a 14 person dinner party. Always multiple starters, mains, sides and of course dessert. more was always better!

for large dinner parties, I usually prepped for 1.5 days. This is what my ‘day of’ prep list looked like for the dinner party.

These checklists made such a big impact that last year I actually teamed up with Notion to create two free templates, one for private cheffing and one for at-home hosting, to build out the systems I was using and allow other people to access my systems. (here’s my plug to check them out, I couldn’t do my job without them).

Funny enough, out of that long ass menu and evvvvvvvverything I cooked for my clients that night, the crowd favorite was far and away the warm little mushroom tartlets I served as an appetizer. They ended up looking quite artful with the arrangement of the tiny beech mushrooms on top and utilized one of my favorite appetizer hacks, using pre-made mini tart shells that allow you to fully prep the bite with whatever filling your heart desires, and then bake just before serving.

a method for mushrooms tartlets

what you need:

• minced shallots

• thyme

• dry white wine

• finely chopped mixed mushrooms (a pound or so)

• beech mushrooms (or similar in looks- I suggest checking out your local Japanese grocer)

• butter

• soft goat cheese

• phyllo shells like these

• kosher salt

• black pepper

• evoo

what you do:

heat a splash of evoo in a frying pan and when hot, add some minced shallots, thyme leaves from a few sprigs and a hit of salt and fresh cracked pepper. when softened (2-3 mins), add a few glugs of white wine and reduce until about a tbsp of liquid remains. Add chopped mushrooms, a tbsp or two of butter, and more salt and pep. Cook, stirring occasionally until mushrooms are soft and slightly caramelised, 5-7 mins. Add a few spoonfuls of goat cheese and stir to melt into the mushrooms. Taste and season as needed.

for the spotted mushroom design, I used the caps of small brown and white shimeji mushrooms that I found at my local Japanese grocer. Any mushroom with a small cap will work for this design, or get creative with a different mushroom and pattern! Fill the phyllo shells with the mushrooms filling and then arrange the mushroom caps in desired pattern. You can keep these in the fridge until ready to bake and serve.

Before baking, brush the tops of the mushrooms with evoo and another sprinkle of s&p. Bake at 400 F for about 7-8 mins until heated through. Garnish with some fresh chopped green herbs such as parsley or chives, and serve immediately.

This filling can also be used to stuff mushrooms, stuff omelettes, mix in with pasta, the options are endless!!!

some housekeeping

LA WILDFIRES

The devastation LA continues to face from these wildfires is unfathomable. If you or any loved ones have been affected and have gofund me pages, please send me a note as I would love to contribute and share on my page. I’m also happy to share that this Saturday, January 18th, I’ll be teaming up with ~25 other NYC chefs for an epic baked goods sale as part of an even larger event to raise funds for ongoing relief efforts in LA. Details will be in Friday’s newsletter.

SUBSTACK

I’ll be rolling out a paid subscription model for Forklore in the coming weeks. It’s been so lovely to find my footing on here these past few months and I ended the year with just about 5,000 subscribers which blows me away. You can expect a lot more of what you’ve been seeing: mix of personal anecdotes, travel guides and recommendations, occasional apartment renovations… with the anchoring theme of annotated recipes: the what and why behind the method, and the trials and tribulations behind the development. Please consider upgrading to a paid subscription if you’ve been liking the newsletter so far :)

This Friday look out for cozy hosting part 2 along with a recap of my recent trip to Austria and Germany.

Thanks for being here! xx

Maddy